Shaking Up the Herd – An Introduction to Flash Mobs

Most of us walk around with our heads up our or asses – myself included. We’ve become familiar and bored with the goings-on of everyday existence. We shut out the ‘mundane’ and choose to live in a perpetual state of “auto-pilot”, glossing over life’s subtle details and reverting into the neurosis of our own internal habitats. We’re so wrapped up in our own self-created delusions and trivial engagements that we don’t have time to stop and smell those stinking roses – oh, how boring. I guess this is why the idea of a flash mob appeals so much to me.

The premise is simple really. Picture the average American roaming around. Perhaps he’s in a shopping mall talking on his cell phone, or maybe he’s caught up in a reoccurring day dream. Whatever the circumstance may be – you can bank on that fact that he’s not fully attentive to the moment. In fact, he’s probably bored out of his gourd. Time just seems to dwindle on forever doesn’t it?

But wait; let’s shake up the heard a bit shall we?

Now enters a young gang of scantily clad pirates. There are about a hundred of these freaks, packed into the back of nine rented cargo vans. They arrive like clockwork at the rear entrance of the same mall that ‘average Joe American’ is currently putzing around in. The clock strikes 4:15pm and they spill out of their automobiles like coffee beans. Roaring and cursing, they barrage through the front door of that boring-old-suburban mall. People don’t know what the hell to think. Dozens upon dozens of maniacal pirates have just entered the building brazing shiny toy swords and skull-and-cross-bone eye patches. The herd’s been shaken up alright! Men, women and children are aghast at the spectacle that has just taken place before them. Some laugh, some cry, others try to makes sense of this ostensibly unfounded act.

It’s 4:23pm and the pirates have vanished almost as swiftly as they arrived. The mall cop almost nabbed one of em’ – but atlas he ending up slipping on a red rubber parrot. The mall patrons are still left shaking their heads. In another ten minutes life will return to normalcy, but one thing is for certain, the day’s proceedings aren’t something that they will soon forget.

Yes, it may be true that flash mob participants are dorky and immature adults with too much time on their hands. But I’d prefer to think of them as enlightened thrill-seekers whose mission is to end the monotony of everyday life by restoring imagination and wonder back into eye of the general public.

Po is a contributing writer and the founder of Get instant updates for this blog via Twitter: PGTblog.



Filed under Entertainment

6 responses to “Shaking Up the Herd – An Introduction to Flash Mobs

  1. tom

    an entertaining read

  2. eelliso1

    I want to join in on one of those.

  3. soahki

    This is hilarious. I’ve never seen a flash mob, but I’d love it if one came through my office. Right now would be good.

  4. KevinKMJr

    I may have to recruit Merkaba in his next visit to Erie. This sounds like a most amusing social experiment!

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