More often than not, on a regular, daily basis, I will find myself talking shit about someone I know. Golly, I cannot resist the chance to gossip, expounding upon every detail entrusted to me by an unsuspecting other. It’s a time honored tradition, especially amongst women. I’ve always wondered why I am friends with a sizable group of the same sex (30+ men), yet so very few females maintain large friend groups of the same sex (Maybe 5?).
Why can’t women stand each other? Because they talk shit about each other so often. Borderline non-stop. And what they don’t realize (or maybe they do actually), is that with a greater integration of individuals, whatever it is they said about person ‘B’ is going to be heard by person ‘B’.
Men must spend more time doing things than saying things. Its in our socialization. As youth we go out and compete amongst one another to flaunt our athleticism and determine who is best, while the girls talked. Or something like that. Men dealt with things honestly, directly; “Wow Jake, you really suck, don’t play with us anymore.” Women deal with things respectfully, indirectly, avoiding conflict until they can get behind closed doors; “See you tomorrow Sally!” [aside] “What a bitch.”
Is it dependency on others? Women are less physically capable to succeed than men, so they depend on the pooling of resources and labor that comes with a collective. I could see that, but then why would females so readily burn bridges by shit talking? Is this just a phenomenon among modern independent women? I have no idea. I should hedge my bets on the idea that they don’t realize that the gossip is going to come back at them. That’s a point duly taken; I probably dug a deep hole myself already.
I’ve had my fill with gossip; everyone is susceptible to its appeal. Truly a great bit of fun, but I can only imagine the bearing of bad fruit in the future.
I don’t think that I will ever know all that is said, and frankly, I really don’t care for it. There is a lesson to be learned though; gossiping about person ‘B’ is not going to make person ‘B’ think very highly of you for very long. Therefore, in order to maintain my valuable standing with my current friends, I vow to be critical of them to their faces, as opposed to gossiping about them later in supposed distant safety.
And yes, my adherence to that ideal will begin after this very period.•